
Book #76 of 2023:
How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing by KC Davis, LPC
Probably the best self-help book I’ve ever read, and all the more so for its short length, with author KC Davis evincing none of that genre’s usual need to belabor her points ad nauseum just to beef up the page count. As a licensed therapist with significant disclosed mental health issues herself, she instead presents readers with a straightforward yet radical new paradigm for thinking about our regular chores — which she refers to as care tasks, applying to upkeep of either one’s household or one’s physical body — in a way that’s compassionate, morally neutral, and utterly free of shame.
If you’re the sort of person who believes in a ‘tough love’ approach to motivate either yourself or others, this might not be the right book for you! (Although I hope you’d still consider it with an open mind.) For the rest of us, it’s a truly kind reminder that your living space is there to serve you rather than the other way around, that even minimal progress on a to-do item is better than a paralysis of executive functioning that keeps you from starting the activity at all, and that rest is a vital human requirement like any other. Most striking for me is the idea that taking any of those maintenance actions is a gift you can bestow on your future self — but also that you can always choose not to do so in the moment, if that’s what your present self needs more.
Davis includes commentary on how privilege can intersect with these topics, from gender inequity in expectations / share of household duties, to the greater social pressures in some marginalized communities to maintain appearances, to the negative response behaviors that can become associated with particular tasks due to one’s personal history of trauma. Above all, she stresses: you are not lazy for struggling with things that (seem to) come easily for others. And you can find strategies for handling those things in your own way without having to feel like you’re drowning.
It’s a lesson I expect to resonate with me for quite some time to come.
★★★★★
Like this review?
–Throw me a quick one-time donation here!
https://ko-fi.com/lesserjoke
–Subscribe here to support my writing and weigh in on what I read next!
https://patreon.com/lesserjoke
–Follow along on Goodreads here!
https://www.goodreads.com/user/show/6288479-joe-kessler
–Or click here to browse through all my previous reviews!
https://lesserjoke.home.blog








